Joker's Bottle of Frogs

by JokerXL

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Petty in the extreme!

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I was driving through Dublin yesterday, along a road that used to be a scrappy old thing adjacent to some scrubland but has now been redeveloped with nice apartments and offices, the way a lot of Dublin's old outskirts are going.
The road comes out at a set of traffic lights opposite where I needed to be to make a delivery. There's now a security hut on that junction. Two security guards stood outside, blocking the road, signaling me to stop, which of course I did, being the nice feller I am.
One comes to the window while the other fails in an attempt to get the barrier thing that comes up out of the road, to come up out of the road.
"where have you come from" says he.
"Holland" says I.
"no," says he "have you been delivering to this new estate behind you?"
"not today" says I.
"well you'll have to go back" he says "this is a private road now and we don't want large vehicles coming through here any more"
So I'm thinking; I've just come through a mile and a half of road they want me to stay out of and now he wants me to go back through the road they want me to stay out of while I'm 30 yards from where I need to be.
So I said no, understandably, I thought, in the circumstances, and rolled up the window again.
They conferred, talked into their radios, and said I'd have to back up.
Now, I'm not sure which part of "no, I'm not going to do that" they were having trouble with but there was a fair bit of scratching of heads going on out there.
Meanwhile, the through-traffic's building up and they're having to direct incoming and exiting traffic alternately around me. I'd put the tachograph on "break" and was enjoying the newspaper. I was 2 hours ahead of schedual and due a bit of a break anyway.
One of the security guards had gone inside to fetch his jacket, it'd started raining, the other was still directing traffic and blocking my road out.
A battle of wills ensued! Dirty looks from them, out in the rain, directing traffic. Indifference from me, inside, warm and dry, reading the paper and eating my lunch.
I'd decided to give it an hour and a half before I'd have to give in and back out of there. Twenty minutes later guard #1 comes to the window and informs me that "traffic control have decided it was ok to let me through but," (get this) "if I came through here again they would confiscate the vehicle"!!
I politely told him he might need more than two of them for that, and to bring a big stick.
I very nearly told him he'd have to wait another half an hour as I was in the middle of a break but thought I'd better not push my luck and got out of there.
The strangest things happen along the way!
:-)
22nd Feb 2008, 12:29  

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billion says:

I can imagine the security guards muttering to each other "stubborn in the extreme..." but it appears that you had the upper hand, bravo!

by the way what's the picture of?

22nd Feb 2008, 12:46

give a bloke a new truck and he thinks he owns the road... ;-)

22nd Feb 2008, 13:02

JokerXL says:

He, he, I Win!
:-)
The photo is of my Hi-Viz "vest of invincibility"

23rd Feb 2008, 08:10

Viv says:

great story - thanks

24th Feb 2008, 18:38

One up for the good guys...

24th Feb 2008, 18:40

540air says:

hahahahahaha Great work there sir. I can just imagine the two of them trying to confiscate the truck, what were they planning to do, carry it away somewhere? ;D

25th Feb 2008, 11:53

hildegard says:

Well done Mr J, I do love to see petty and arbitrary authority thoroughly flouted.

25th Feb 2008, 12:15