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Oooh! I ended up going for a Sansumg Tocco. Pretty much style over content, but it's really dinky, and the OS seems really nifty. Waiting for it to register so further review to come. I hear the browser's a bit ropey, but I'll pop Opera mini on there anyway...
And on Orange they've given me this 8gig card! It's stupidly small, i'm amazed I haven't accidentally eaten it or something.
No wifi, sadly, but unlimited data on a £30 talkplan. So that'll do.